Persistent God & Meaningful Community in the Midst of Loneliness

Hi, my name is Abigail and I’m a 3rd year Kinesiology student at The University of Toronto. I’m currently involved in Power to Change at UofT, and today I’m going to be sharing about how I grew in my faith during the pandemic. I know you are all probably tired of hearing about the pandemic and struggles during quarantine but please bear with me :)

When quarantine first started, I was honestly quite happy. I was glad for the opportunity to slow life down and spend time by myself. I’m very introverted so social interactions can often drain my energy. I was thankful for the pandemic as it gave me an excuse to stay home and away from constant social engagement.

However, as the weeks progressed of staying at home and not seeing people face to face, I began to struggle mentally and spiritually. I felt very alone during this time and chose to isolate myself further by not joining virtual events or connecting with friends online. This led me to feel extremely disconnected from my friends, classmates, and God. Instead of turning to God during these times, I found myself trying to stay occupied with work and school and found comfort in productivity. I would spend hours in front of the computer working on assignments and completing tasks for my job. Although doing work wasn’t enjoyable it kept me busy and prevented me from feeling anxious and alone. As the days progressed, my focus on school and work grew and I became complacent in my walk with God. I went from spending time with God every day to going days and weeks without picking up my Bible and communicating with God. I had grown apathetic and failed to see the relevance of God in my day-to-day life.

During this time my focus was completely away from God so when some of my friends decided to start a bible study together, I was hesitant to join knowing it had been a while since I had spent time with God. However, I knew that this bible study would be beneficial for me since I was really lacking in desire and commitment to grow in my relationship with God. This bible study turned out to be one of the best things that could have happened to me during quarantine. Week by week as I read through the book of Romans, I became so much more aware of my sinful nature and how I had made my work and own comfort a priority in my life. Through those times of loneliness, I also realized how I was neglecting to focus my attention and affection on God and that’s why I found it difficult to feel His presence with me.

I had been straying away from God... but God was still persistent in my life and despite my failings, His love for those wandering such as myself still remained.

Romans 8:38-39 says that “For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” This verse highlights that no matter the situation, nothing can separate us from God’s love. When life becomes mundane, it is so easy to forget the greatest love in the world that we can experience. This love is portrayed through God sending His son Jesus to die for our sins. Through Jesus’s death and resurrection, he defeated sin which enables us to enjoy a relationship with God. We often forget that God loves us, pursues us, and is the only one who can sustain us. Remembering these truths helped me to fight complacency and reminded me that I was unable to live life by relying on my own strengths.

I had been trying to use school and work to comfort myself, but they were only temporary distractions from feelings of loneliness. I realized how much I needed God and was reminded that He is truly the only one who will ever fully satisfy me and be my comfort. In this time, I also learned the importance of community. Before the pandemic, I had overlooked the need for community and chose to maintain many superficial relationships which lacked substance.

I struggled to be open with people and was hesitant to develop deep relationships... but God showed me the importance of friends who can point me to Christ and help me to grow in my faith.

Reflecting on God’s love made me realize the importance of extending this love to other through fellowship and community. God emphasizes the importance of Christian community all throughout Scripture as seen in Hebrews 10: 24-25 which says: And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.

This is something that even today over a year later I’m still working on and constantly reminding myself of. Meaningful Christian relationships can be difficult and take time to develop, but as humans we are built to commune not only with God but with others, so I encourage you to take that step and reach out to those around you.

To end, I also want to encourage you to reflect on what it means to seek God first. You may relate to my situation during quarantine where it’s been weeks or months since you’ve read the Bible or spent time in prayer. Or perhaps you’re reading this and have never read the Bible. I want to remind you that God desires to have a relationship with you. Start today and read for yourselves the truth of what God says in His word, I want you to see for yourself the goodness of God and to know the author and creator of your life. I’ve learned that seeking God involves fixing my mind and heart on God and gaining an intimate knowledge of who He is not fix a problem in my life but to know Him. By knowing God and examining His word, He will also reveal himself to us which really is a blessing!